My Bio

Hi, my name is Andrew G. Watters. I am a radically honest, category-defying polymath based in Redwood City, California, USA. I am primarily a lawyer, with a law degree from U.C. College of Law San Francisco (formerly known as U.C. Hastings College of Law), a bachelor's degree from UCLA, and eighteen years of professional experience. I have had my own practice since 2012, and my own law firm since 2016. I offer legal services, including complex private investigations; and a custom software platform for attorneys called Slash. I am married to Mrs. Right, with whom I welcomed our daughter Jennifer in 2022. We started team-teaching an English program in 2023. My personal trademark is my carbon fiber briefcase from Tecknomonster, a combined aerospace/luggage company. For entertainment purposes, I recently resurrected a popular anonymous discussion board for lawyers called JD Underground, which has been a great diversion from the law firm for me.

News

August 25, 2024: I am extremely dissatisfied with the current desk phone system at my office, which has been plagued with problems since day one of this system almost three years ago. I barely ever use it, and some of the phones still don't work, which irritates me because I'm paying a not insignificant amount per month for the VOIP subscription. It occurred to me to simply bring phone calls into each person's computer so that they can receive and place calls directly from the computer desktop. They also may get the ability to have SMS/text-style messaging from their computers without revealing staff's personal phone numbers. This is possible with a system called an on-premise virtual PBX, which is a server that goes in the I.T. closet. Everything else is handled in an app on their computer. I'm taking a survey internally and this will be a fun project.

August 23, 2024: Ian Docherty continues to play my Purple Rain guitar in shows. This one was attended by about 1,000 people, and I love the candid shots he posted on IG. The Mark II guitar will have higher performing paint, but this is a great look even with the prototype. It's gratifying seeing this instrument in the hands of such a talented player.

July 12, 2024: Scam warning: offshore criminals are impersonating me in a gift card scam by registering fake Gmail email addresses and putting my name in the From: field, and asking prospective victims for phone numbers. They then send iMessages/text messages to victims who reply. The requests are illegitimate requests for money that have nothing to do with me. Note that I do not use an iPhone and have no devices that send iMessages. Accordingly, verify all emails purporting to be from me with SPF/DKIM/DMARC, which are available in the raw source/headers of all legitimate emails from me and my law firm. Confirm by phone any unusual requests or instructions, such as making payments or advancing money. Note that I only use my 415 number (+1 (415) 261-8527) and not Google Voice, for this very reason. I have added a filter on my email server that should catch all emails with my name in the From: field but the wrong sender address. That protects folks within the law firm, but third parties are on their own. This same thing happened to another local attorney whose email got hacked and used for a major phishing campaign. Fortunately, I have my own server and will be immune to that, but vigilance is still required. Forward all suspicious emails to abuse@google.com and cc me at andrew@andrewwatters.com.

Ventures

These are my current business ventures:

Attorney - general civil litigation and complex family law, with eighteen years of experience and thirty-six trials (plus three JAMS arbitrations). Also available for complex private investigations, including missing persons/homicide and cyber/corporate espionage. Software platform Slash for licensing to fellow attorneys who want a non-Clio solution.

Rællic® - special projects, Advanced Information Systems, and custom guitars.

The Polite Gunfighter® - legal insurance for CCW holders, currently being put together for a California release in 2025.

Tutorials and Articles

Here are my popular tutorials/articles/videos:

Linux tips and tricks - random tips learned the hard way. 🔥

Creative writing - I seem to have an unusual connection to the ether that gives me a limitless supply of material.

Run your own email server Howto - have you ever wanted to take full control of your email? Not for the faint of heart.

Privoxy on macOS Howto - have you ever wanted to block ads on the web on your Mac without having to install MacPorts? This is for you.

Lattice™ - next-gen user interface for slash.law, featuring a novel technique for focus detection and raising.

Andy's Dashboard - a free charting solution for server administrators.

Introduction to microexpressions - my guest lecture at Stanford.

Unboxing a new IBM Model M keyboard - travel back in time to 1988.

Andy's Hardware - market research on the concept of a Made in USA hardware store.

100G office network Howto - the fastest, most reliable office LAN that money can buy.

10 gigabit networking - a howto on my 10 gig office setup, which rocks.

The Forever War - my superfan-level tribute to the greatest science fiction novel of all time.

A fractal crystal lattice of Gaussian primes - research on the fractality of prime numbers in Mathematica.

My trademark concept art - I commissioned this piece from a vision in my head, and I decided to start using it as my background. It really fits me, I think.


Hall of Fame: services, products, and service providers that I use and strongly recommend.

Hall of Shame: if someone gets me to the point of posting a whole web page about them on here, you know they went way too far in whatever they were doing wrong.